我要记得忘记。
jenzi, your lyrics [: see lah, you influence me to like all the chinese songs can. haha.

i'm sorry boyf, i don't know what the hell i'm doing. i know i'm hurting you, but i guess it's better that i hurt you now, then let you see me like this, for who knows how long before i recover. sorry, i love you still, alot. i hope you know that. i don't mean to push you away, what's my problem. i really want you with me, but i don't want you to get upset just cause of me. i really still love you beehiang. i'm sorry. 你会明白吗？

i guess why i didn't go to school today, was cause i really didn't want anyone to see me cry, again.
it's stupid, and it hurts people, like what caroline said. and i don't want to be an idiot, who cries, and not even know why she's crying. it's true, i'm afraid that you guys will get sick of me. irritated, and just so fed up. maybe that's why i push you guys away, cause i'd rather go through it myself, then have you guys go through it with me, and hate me in the end. i just feel that way, don't tell me what i'm feeling is wrong. 虽然我是要你们在我身边但是我不想让你们和我一起的难过。你们了解吗？

i feel weird, lol, terribly.
oh well [: byebye.

edit/ 1:26pm
yes don't worry, i'll get better, so i never have to see you again [: not that i don't like you, and i'm sorry if i ever gave you that impression. but seeing you makes me feel helpless, like as if i can't help myself. sorry if i ever was rude, sorry if i appeared to really hate you. cause i don't. thank you anyway [: but i don't ever want to see you again.

i'll get better by my own. i'll do it, cause i know i can. cause i know i can save myself. cause i know i've got beehiang and i know i've got joan. i know i'm not alone, i know i can be saved. i can do it, i know i can. i just have to. cause i have to prove you wrong, i have to prove all of you who doubt me wrong. [:

i feel so much better. at least i can do away with him and the med. i don't feel so reliant anymore. i know it'll be difficult without the med, but i can do it [: i know i can.

thank iris rachel and beehiang for your sms, it made me feel, well, missed <3>

i was teaching this song when i started to cry,
kid's prayer
i want to know you Lord
you are a great big God
i'm young and do not know alot
come and be my all

i want to love you more
giving you my life and all
you died for me
you've sacrificed
i won't forget you Lord.

i love you Jesus
i'll grow up knowing you
i love you Jesus
i'll grow up serving you

i love you Jesus
my life is saved by you
i'll never forget
never forget
i'll grow up loving you
[:

i'll never forget You, i know that i've got You.
okay [: i'm smiling [: yes okay i shall go for tuition. i shan't be alone anymore [:

thank you joan. for reassuring me last night. for your acceptance. i know i didn't tell you much, but you still understood. sometimes i wonder why we're so alike, and why we always seem to go through the same thing at the same time. maybe it's all God's plan [: but thank you joan, for always seeing me through my storms. thank you for always letting me see you through your storm too. together forever, yes to our promise i'll stay true [:

lastly. thank you beehiang. for everything. cause you've never given up on me. you didn't understand, but you accepted. thank you for telling me you weren't blind, when no one seemed to care. thank you. thank you for telling me that you would be right there waiting for me to turn around. thank you beehiang. i don't know if i would have made it so far without you. thank you for your continous support and love. thank you for your friendship. thank you for always telling me, that things would turn out fine. you have no idea how much i appreciate you. thank you beehiang. thank you <3 i love you, the most [: